if

If I get a large sum of money next week, I will give it to Mom and Dad so they can travel around the world, enjoying life, something they should have started to be doing, all this time.

If.

along the road

Hi again.

Reading Dee's and Marcell's blog always gives me a sense of fulfillment. A pure gratitude and relief to know that at least there are 2 humans in this world that understand, or try to understand their existence. And during their neverending process of understanding, I choose to learn from them, from the messages and thoughts they compile each and every day.

I believe that every one of us has the capacity, ability and will to actually think, to understand our existence in this world. Unfortunately, somehow this will is distorted, compensated, put down by whatever notion we are clinging to. Religion. Fun-ness of life. Fear. Shame.

People consider this too heavy to talk about. People think that this isn't needed, we believe in God. People think that it's just too scary. People think that it's so nerdy, it's so uncool. It's not fun. People think that they are still in the morning of life, it's too early, thinking that they still have so much time in life.

Do you think that way?

Or, isn't it just that we don't get to meet people with the same will, same intention, so that we bury it so deep, choosing to not try to think or talk about our existence?

I did. I find it so hard to find people who actually talk about things, things like this, things I need to share without being compensated at all, things about 'our existence'. But sometimes I'd still do it, and I got scared all the time. But that's before I read Dee's books, Marcell's blog. It gives me a sense of security, just to know that I'm not alone in this, some people are trying to figure it out too.

I changed.

Part of the cause is that I think, therefore I find new things, new answers to old questions, better answers. I change because I know I have to change. It's been good. The sad part is, almost no one is there to share, to actually grow with me, to find new things together, and change together.

Let's talk about things. Things that we did the wrong way, things we should do better, things in life that is basic, so basic that we thought it was too uncool to be talked about. Let's chat, about life. I would do it, but I hope, you start doing it too. You'll change a lot, because by taking one step forward in the road of understanding things, you'll find a lot of new things. Don't be afraid. I'm coming along with you, and others will join us too.



Let's figure it out together.

Have a nice day.

Supernova

Good morning, world.

I find my apartment very windy, this morning. Well that's rare. With a blowing wind like this, I expect severe amount of clouds by 1 oclock, and heavy rain by 5 oclock. I hope it will happen.

Lesson of the morning: Do not bite an apple without looking the part you want to bite. You might swallow a part you don't wanna swallow, and by the time you realise it, it's stuck in your throat already.



Have a very good day, everyone.

you and me

It's seven o clock and I’m on my way..
Eating the miles down this highway..
Say that you’ll wait for me..
To light up the Christmas tree..

Tell you the first thing that I'm gonna do..
Holding and squeezing and kissing you
under the mistletoe..
I’ve been missing you so..

This is the first holiday we’ll spend every night
I pray that it never ends..
Feels like meant to be
when I have you next to me..

Can’t wait to have you to myself..
Cuz I need you and no one else..
There’s no place in this world I’d rather be..

You’re the only present that I need..
The perfect combination is christmas, you, and me.

Christmas, you, and me..

Brian McKnight - Christmas You and Me



I can't wait for Christmas to come.

Enough said.



Nite, everyone.

lessons

Lesson 1: Do not ever smack a plastic container that just came out from the freezer to any place, edge, or surface. The container will break and or crack.

Lesson 2: Do not ever lose keys. The psychological effect does more than anything else.

From now, instead of waiting for appropriate mood to write things out here, I will post short notes about lessons of the day. The ones I learn by myself. It usually means, the result or consequences have done something to me. Therefore, I'd take it as a lesson for myself, and for you all to share. Little things.

Anw.

Next week will be the announcement of another logo competition that I joined. I keep my fingers crossed. Far from hope, but I don't know, I hope it will be the day when things come around, again, after a very long while.

Finally it's only 1 month until I leave PJ again, and head home. I kinda love it this time here, compared to last semester. Things are just better. I have my own room, I manage to go for my gym sessions, I start cooking dinner, I live a quite healthy life (or at least better) and everything is just nice.

Well. Tonight, after a while, I finally can actually read magazines, and say hello to a worry-free weekend, unlike the past few weeks.

Better. Things are better.



Thanks, everyone!

4

Hi.

I just came back from college. Been many times of me going back and forth, from apartment to college, these 2-3 days. Not that it's far or anything, it's just next door, but you know, somehow you think it's too much.

Thank God, yesterday and today, rain has been all over my place. The air becomes more breathable, it's just very refreshing. Not only that, also when I'm sleeping at night. Sleeping without aircon becomes somehow enjoyable. Very.

Back to now.

I just did another Architecture History quiz. I've done 2 before. The first one, I studied everything seriously, was very much confident with myself. Mark that I got? 4/8.

The second one, which was 2 weeks after the first one, I didn't really study, coz i didn't see that one coming. I thought one quiz is enough. Yeah I was definitely dreaming. This one, with me studying only for one hour, I thought let's give this a good shot, maybe I'm lucky so that I can get a good mark. Result? 4/9.

The third one, which was like one hour ago, I just knew that it's on early this morning. But I managed to study quite extensively. Though, I didn't put too much hope in this, realizing that I got 2 bad marks before and I felt like ready for anything.

Mark? 4/10.

HA. See. I don't know if this is a joke or anything. I studied and I understood the lectures, and I'm very interested in knowing as much as I can, which made me want to study even more. Yeah. But all I got is the number 4. I literally don't know what to do. Well, nothing, since this is the last quiz anyway. Studying is not good, not studying is also not good. Well, I'll definitely study as hard as I can. But it's just, your hope is crushed, and you become somehow powerless. Hopeless.

Or is it just me not getting along with the word 'history'?

I don't know. 4. I don't want to get 4 no more. TT



ANYWAY. 4 is the number for today.

Congratulations, Mr Obama for being elected as 44th President of US.

=D

Have a nice eve, everyone.

daniel powter

At this point of time, I really want to bookmark my life. Should we call it 'lifemark'? Okay. Maybe not. But you get my point.

These days, I'm doing my job as an architecture student quite well. Assignments. Frustrating assignments. Limited sleep time. Limited gym session. Less fun. But I manage to go through everything. And it is good to have it that way. Exams are coming in 2 weeks time, and the final presentation is after exam week. Let's call it doomsday. I better start preparing.

These days, I feel like a complete person. Muw. Very good friends around me. Very good friends in another island not very far from here, or very far from here.

And the most recent news is that when an e-mail says that my logo design for Singapore 2010 Youth Olympic Games is shortlisted. I can't thank God enough for this. You know what I haven't ever won a thing in design. And I've done like a hundred of designs. But right now, winning is a bonus. Being shortlisted, is the ultimate gift which I be greatly thankful of.

Someday, later in my life, I want to read this post again and remember how good the days were.

I miss everyone.

I miss my family.

=')

These are additional things that find me comfort at those hard times: heartwarming random blogs. funny blogs. rain. random chat with strangers. a very wonderful morning. a wonderful afternoon. gym sessions. the images of jakarta. good songs.

Thanks, God.



Have a nice eve, you.

Laskar Pelangi

Saya baru nonton film ini tadi siang, sendirian, setelah menahan selama berhari2 karna ga ada yang bisa diajak nonton. Saya mulai nonton ini dengan tingkat ekspektasi yang seubun-ubun tingginya. Saya belum baca novelnya, hanya karna saya ga suka kertas novelnya, yang makai kertas koran. Tapi itu ga menghempas kepercayaan saya terhadap cerita ini, cerita tentang Laskar Pelangi.

Saya duduk. Film mulai.

Saya mulai gak kuasa menahan haru.

=']

Ini cerita hebat. Film hebat. Pesan hebat.
Kalau ada satu hari lagi saya bisa di Jakarta, saya akan nonton lagi.

Mimpi. Adalah kunci. Untuk kita. Menaklukan dunia.
Berlarilah. Tanpa lelah. Sampai engkau. Meraihnya.

Laskar Pelangi. Takkan terikat waktu.
Bebaskan mimpimu di angkasa.
Warnai bintang di jiwa.

Menarilah dan terus tertawa.
Walau dunia tak seindah surga.
Bersyukurlah pada yang kuasa.
Cinta kita di dunia.

Selamanya.



Tiba2 saya sadar. Sering saya mengkhawatirkan keterbatasan. Gak punya ini, gak punya itu. Jadi alasan, saya gak mampu berbuat ini, berbuat itu. Dari film ini, saya sadar, keterbatasan itu omong kosong. Punya otak, punya hati, punya cita2.. pasti bisa. Mereka bisa. Saya gak boleh cuma menggerutu dan mengeluh, saya harus percaya dan bisa.

Menarilah dan terus tertawa.
Walau dunia tak seindah surga.

Saya harus lebih positif, lebih melihat kedepan tanpa risau hal2 kecil.
Gak boleh khawatir. Tapi percaya dan berbuat yang terbaik.

Terima kasih telah menjadi pesan.
Terima kasih telah mengingatkan.

Jakarta memang indah. Saya hanyut. Kadang tenggelam.

Tapi, di setiap tempat, di mana pun saya berada dan tinggal, pasti sama indahnya. Indah yang berbeda, yang gak mungkin dilupa. Indah yang ada, itu pasti, saya tak perlu cari, saya tak perlu percaya, karna memang itu ada.



Saya hanya harus mulai membuka mata.

=]

I'm going back to PJ tomorrow, and I'm feeling fine.

I hope this lasts for long.